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Is the mind really that fickle?

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 My first boyfriend and I bonded over theology. He and his family were part of a home-based, semi-exclusive, Christian church. We met in our last year of school, when we were 17, and he had begun questioning his restrictive upbringing. There were a lot more rules about behaviour in his church than mine. For instance, women were not allowed to wear pants or cut their hair short. The only permitted biblical translation was the King James version. Most relationships outside the church were frowned upon – even relationships with other Christians. One of the core beliefs of his congregation was that they were the only Christians who got it all right; that all other Christian churches were on the path to eternal separation from God. Needless to say, I was intrigued. He was open to talking about it and questioning what he had been taught. Our theological discussions were usually tilted towards my interpretations of scripture.   After all, I was the one who had been taught to look at the or

Choices

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I’ve been putting off this blog entry for a while because this topic opens up a philosophical can of worms. To avoid drowning in philosophy, I’ve decided to make the bulk of this post a series of questions. These questions get to the heart of why I believe Christianity is incompatible with life as a human. On choices in general… What causes us to make choices? Is it pure ‘rationality’, or are there other factors? How important are those other factors? If we always have full power over our choices, why does marketing work? Why do people choose to do things that hurt themselves? Why did I choose to snooze my alarm today? I wanted to get up early. Is being tired a good excuse? Does it justify the choice? Did I make that choice or was it my body? Am I my brain? Is the one who makes choices separate from my body altogether? What if we extend this reasoning to other, more consequential, choices?   Photo by me. In the Bible, ‘sinning’ is when one disobeys God’s commandme

Forever, ever?

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I just can’t get behind the idea of life after death. Our life on earth is unimaginably short compared to eternity. One could even say it’s infinitely short, since eternity is infinitely long. The concept that such a short existence determines our eternal fate is, at best, extremely unreasonable. My birth mother died when I was three years old. Immediately following this event, the idea of heaven and everlasting life was lovingly instilled in me by many caring adults. They told me that my mother would always be watching and that she was happy and doing well – I just couldn’t see her anymore. Photo by me However, upon the introduction of Christianity into my life I had to confront the fact that there was another place she could be. As far as everyone knows, she was not a Christian. Her family are not Christians. My father (her husband) was not a Christian when she was alive. It’s most likely that she died without confessing her faith in Jesus (this is the way

A Happier Mind

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When people find out I’m an atheist, they sometimes ask me how I can find meaning in life. Indeed, when I began my journey away from Christianity, I often felt afraid of meaninglessness. Why are we here? What happens when we die? What’s our purpose? What is love, beauty, good, evil? What about this “God shaped hole” that we all have? For a while, I got into the habit of saying “I don’t know” to life’s big questions. During this time, some people would tell me that “I can’t keep living in limbo,” implying that uncertainty in life and death is unhealthy. However, my experience has been on the contrary. I can say, with confidence, that I have found peace, wonder, and comfort within a life of accepting the unknown. Photo by me. Studying physics has made me realise just how special it is to be human. The human brain, amazing as it is, cannot fully comprehend reality and the universe. Yet, we are able to come close, little by little. For me, the most amazing thing a

Doubting

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First, a Bible excerpt - John 20:24-29 New International Version (NIV). Jesus Appears to Thomas 24  Now Thomas (also known as Didymus), one of the Twelve, was not with the disciples when Jesus came.  25  So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord!” But he said to them, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.” 26  A week later his disciples were in the house again, and Thomas was with them. Though the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you!”  27  Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.” 28  Thomas said to him, “My Lord and my God!” 29  Then Jesus told him, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” Photo by me. Jesus’ rebuke of Peter in this story, “…blessed a

Them

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A change of social scenery was one of the biggest factors that brought about my change of mind regarding Christianity. Speaking of scenery. Photo by me. When I was in high school, I was in a very insulated world – surrounded by people who believed the same things as me and had very similar upbringings. I was aware of this. I was often told to be careful when I went to university and moved out of home; that people would challenge my beliefs and worldview. There were always tales of young people, like me, who would go to university and lose their religion. I’d often practice arguments for Christianity inside my head. The faceless atheist would say, “Why do you believe what you believe?” I would be ready to answer. I imagined atheists as people that just didn’t know the truth about God. I thought that They were perhaps angry or hurting. What possible reason could They have for rejecting the Gospel? I thought that the world was filled with lost people. I knew there was drunk

Purity Culture (Part 2)

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It’s been about 9 years since I left Christianity and I’m still unpacking how growing up as a Pentecostal/Baptist Christian has affected (and still affects) my sex life. As I mentioned in a previous post, losing my virginity was terrible. Yet, there are more ways in which I believe purity culture poisoned my sexuality. Photo by me. The two metaphors I discussed in my last post are centrally focused on permanent loss of and damage to one’s self. This is the idea I had of sexuality going into adulthood: the act of physical intimacy was an act during which I would permanently give something away. I had better save that something for my husband, otherwise I would be damaged goods on my wedding day – un-sticky and full of rocks instead of water. Enter, sexual shame. When I lost my virginity, the mood was of overwhelming shame. Shame as a consequence of sin is a prominent theme in the bible. From the story of Adam and Eve: 6 The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree