face to face

I will never truly lose my religion - my God left an indelible mark on my brain. He exists in my life as a memory of a person who knew everything about me. He was a friend who I could trust with my deepest confessions. He would, at least, keep them a secret. But, he most certainly disapproved of many of my actions. Like many break-ups, it was a messy one. My Fall (so I call it) began almost 10 years ago, but I am still working through it all. Photo by me. Before the Fall, I’m standing in a crowded place. Although 30,000 people surround me, I could be alone. I’m lost - lost in the music, in the lights, in the lyrics: “All my delight is in you, Lord. All of my hope, All of my strength. All my delight is in you, Lord. Forever more.” It’s the truth. I’m bathing in it; tears streaming down my face, hands both raised. In the words of my cousin, I’m “weird”. But I don’t care. I’ve never felt such intense gratefulness, acceptance, longing, hopefulness. I probably never w...